PDA? or NO  PDA? (Public Display of Affection)

PDA? or NO PDA? (Public Display of Affection)

by May 7, 2015 0 comments


“……….I Love you too Honey Bunch!” That was my friend – Steve ending the call with his girlfriend. Now you very sure and you know that he and his girlfriend have just started out their relationship and this is the first few weeks and everything seems just too perfect, have you being in that shoe before? That you just never seem to get enough of your partner and everyone around you notices something different in the way you act? Yes, well, that’s the stage Steve, found himself, he explained that sometimes during that period, he always go to bed on some random days, wake up the next morning, pick up his blackberry to checkup on his mate and #BAM, there it is staring at you, it’s that picture you don’t really like but everyone seems to say you look good in it and she has used it as her blackberry messenger display picture. LOL!

Now, for some of y’all, you’re probably like what’s Steve talking about here? That’s a good thing right? Ok, nice you asked because I asked the same question too **confused face**. Steve told me he will give me some specifics. “Listen, Miss Blogger Head, my relationship in the scenario above is only a month old”, He explained. Still I felt nothing is wrong here, do you think about that too my dear Reader?

Steve illustrated further, “moi Cherie koko doesn’t just stop at just using my picture as her DP, she puts up some pictures we took together on Facebook and BBM, changes her Twitter avatar to a picture of me, publicly tweets mushy stuff at me, posts mushy stuff on my Facebook wall, Updated her status on Facebook, very touchy-feely in public and pretty much seizes any chance she gets to tell anyone who cares to listen that I am her boyfriend and she’s crazy about me”. Seriously, I still see nothing wrong here! Ok, hold that thought, My Friend Steve told me, I will soon get to my point.

“A couple more weeks and she introduces me to her siblings, we visits her family house together and discovers her mother was expecting me. She’s gone out of her way to make an elaborate meal and while I am eating, she engages me in a conversation during which I discover she’s very much up to date on happenings in my life. Now, my girlfriend is twenty two and I am twenty-six. I am pretty sure she’s thinking of marriage anytime soon so her mother assumes and tries to be very close to me as a prospective son in law”.

Ok, don’t mistake the scenario painted above for ‘smoldering with love/affection/whatever’, that’s a different ball game. She doesn’t stalk me or anything, she just seems very ‘expressive’ about her young relationship and as much as all the women (and some guys) reading this doesn’t seem to see any problem here but I do, Steve interjected. “And it’s one I see very often”, he proceeded. Fast forward and Moving on, the relationship is now 6 weeks old. My girlfriend’s old fling comes back into town, one thing leads to another, she cheats, and I can’t forgive, relationship ends. Just like that. The following weekend, Miss ‘ex-girlfriend’ has to join her family for lunch and first thing her mother asks is “Where’s Steve, I’ve told your dad all about him and he can’t wait to meet him.”

It doesn’t stop there, bad news travels fast. All our friends know and then you watch as whispers and subliminal messages fly around our social media contacts. our friends tease and taunt us about all the pictures we now have to delete off our phone and it goes on and on.

So my question today to My Friend Steve and my fellow Readers is: how long is long enough for one to be in a relationship before you start ‘showing off’ your mate to ‘the world’. As inconsequential as the subject may seem, I think if you fall within the ages of 22-30, it’s something worth thinking about. Should there be PDA – (Public Display of Affection) or not in a relationship? If yes, when should it start?

I spoke to my bestie recently and she told me she is in her late twenties and people find it hard to understand when she tells them that her mother has never met any of her boyfriends. Yup. Even the ones that lasted well over a year. Why? Cause for her, it’s a HUGE step. She is tight with her mom so she said she might have to do some ‘sampling’ at this stage of her life before she settles down, and she does not want to bore her with the details. Neither do she wants to show off a different boy to her friends and ‘the rest of the world’ every three months.

I understand that time isn’t a guarantee that things will turn out right but then again, it’s almost logical to think after staying with someone for over a year, you might not even need to ‘show them off’ because it would come naturally. Once again, I might just be too old-fashioned or simply part of a minority but that’s why we are here. I’d like to compare notes, hear from you guys. How long is long enough to stay in a relationship before you ‘show off’ your partner. What are the pros and cons of doing it too early or too late. This question goes both ways so boys and gurls, please use the comment box to speak your mind. Cheers.


Adopted from Thetoolsman – Wale  – (

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